Looks
They're important
But they're not
She loves his personality
But he's too short
He loves her laugh
And the way she stumbles over her words
When she's nervous
And the fact that she is smart
But if she just lost ten more pounds
He could think of her as more then just a friend
Then maybe there could be something more
More
His legs are too skinny
Her boobs are non existent
His lips are too voluptuous
Her ankles are chunky
His nose is actually slightly crooked
And if you look really closely
You can see one nostril is smushed
More than the other
That's going to bother me
I can't
It's not you
It's me
Shallow?
Is it?
I want to say yes
It's wrong
But I'm guilty
I'm guilty of the
"She likes his personality
But he's too short."
Does that make me shallow?
I don't want to be
I just notice these things
And they make it hard to get closer
In that way
But why?
Is it because I'm self conscious about my weight?
About being a bigger
Excuse me
Curvier woman?
No
Sometimes I feel like I look like a man
A man?
How?
But I do
Is that why?
That I feel like I'll crush him
When I rest my head on his shoulder?
I can't even think about sex
Some say it's ridiculous
I say it's my reality
It's not like I choose feeling this way
Is it because of our society?
This world we live in?
America
Obsessed with being beautiful
Or being obsessed with someone else perception of beautiful?
Or what we think they think their perception of beautiful is?
What we think they think
That's funny
What we think
They think we think
Of what they think
Ha
It's endless
We become so concerned
We analyze so much
That we are altering ourselves
Because of what we think
They think
That we think
Of what they think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Think
Just stop
Stop thinking
It's impossible
It feels that way
It's hard to be optimistic about these things
World peace
Everyone is beautiful
I guess there is no true solution
But all I can say
Is that it is exhausting
Changing myself
Censoring myself
Starving myself
Stuffing myself
Looking at myself
Beating myself
Hating myself
To the point that
I don't even know who I am
The true me
The me that I know
I know
I love
If I found that
Someone might look at me and think
Look at me and know
"Damn
That girl
Is
Amazing"